Adjusting to Life in Vancouver – Flashback

…continued from previous post.

So here I was in my new studio apartment in downtown Vancouver. A humble downgrade in size from a 3 story, 4 bedroom condo in Los Angeles.

Life was seemingly kicking my ass, and it kicked my ass far into the neighboring country!

Lisa did her best to take as much emotional pressure off of me by allowing this time to be for myself – to reconnect with myself and to rebuild myself. The spiritual practice that Lisa had introduced me to earlier in the year played a crucial role in that, coupled with dozens of books and dozens of cd’s for personal growth. Those invaluable resources helped heal and build me from the inside.

I hadn’t worked since about May so any income I earned from January till then was about all there was, which wasn’t much. By the end of the year any and all savings had been depleted. Somehow, by God’s grace, we made it through.

Our Thanksgiving and Christmas celebrations in 2006 were humble at best. Three of us were cramped in this little studio apartment but Lisa brightened it up with colorful décor and lots of love.

My loving sister Chrissy was the most supportive person we had in our lives. She made every effort to bridge the relationship between my parents and Lisa and me. She took care of any business I had in LA often paying for expenses. She and my brother in law would often donate or buy us clothes which at times Lisa and Ted desperately needed.

Over the months Lisa had made every attempt to find work. She worked for herself her entire life and hadn’t ever worked for anyone else. A 9-5 job wasn’t in her stratosphere.

One morning, in preparation for a job interview, she took a bus to Sears to use their sample make-up in the make-up department in order to get ready for a job interview. I didn’t even know she did that until days later. We barely had enough money to eat, let alone cosmetics and things we use to take for granted. Wearing hand-me-downs from my sister and make-up sample testers from Sears, it seemed we had totally hit rock bottom.

Lisa and I had always had a strong bond and it certainly was tested several times from all the adversity we faced. There were times when I thought I couldn’t take any more. Had I bit off more than I could chew? Was this marriage going to work? Was I going to survive through it? Although at this point I had overcome much of my inner dragons. There were times when the darkness began to show itself again.

If it wasn’t for the years of personal and professional development training, and of course the love and support of my wife, I wouldn’t have made it. At a psychological, and even spiritual level, I had enough of a grasp to comprehend what I was going through. Still, I don’t know that it made it much easier. It did however, make the struggle that much more meaningful.

The first several months living in Vancouver was kind of a personal retreat for me. My days and nights were spent in efforts solely meant to rebuild myself. Money was scarce yet we always had what we needed by focusing on one day at a time. There was always enough for what we needed and money and opportunities happened to show up just at the right time and no moment sooner.

We continued to build our intangibles, like our professional strengths and mindsets. And through that process we built and strengthened the foundation for our marriage. My relationships with the kids began to improve, which was a challenge worthy of another journal entry in itself.

It was the beginning of taking those ‘lemons’ and making lemonade…

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