If there’s one particular skill you could develop, what would it be? Would it be a technical skill? Physical ability? Super human or psychic powers? How would having those skills change your life?
Well, I can’t promise that this will help you with super-human psychic powers, but it may be the next best thing.
I can say this because in every aspect of my life, (personal, business and all aspects of human relationships), I’ve had to use, and further develop, this important life skill. By continually developing this skill, all other aspects of your entire life will get better.
The most important life skill is communication.
Think about it. Where do most of your problems come from? Lack of communication? …Misunderstandings? …Personality conflicts? …Expectations not met? …Unresolved past issues or grudges? …Not being able to communicate with the right people in the right way?
Whether it’s verbal, non-verbal, speaking or listening, life is ultimately about relationships. (Your friends, your co-workers, your neighbors, your bosses, your employees, your team, your clients, your prospective customers, your husband, wife, boyfriend or girlfriend, your children, your in-laws, the customer service rep, and everyone you interact with.)
Without the ability to build and manage your relationships, your success and happiness is greatly hindered.
The most successful people in the world excel at one thing – communication. They know how to manage their relationships. Sure they may have exceptional technical skills, business aptitude and knowledge, but without the ability to effectively communicate you cannot achieve lasting success. All the talent in the world means very little if you’re not able to effectively communicate with people. This includes building and maintaining good relationships.
Good communication means more than just speaking. There are many layers to communication, but here are 2 of the most important aspects of communication I believe are the most important.
1. The Ability to ‘Sell’:
No matter what business or industry you’re in, everyone is in sales.
Think about it. In conversation, when you’re not listening you’re talking, right? And if you’re not asking questions you’re ultimately selling.
At some point in a conversation you’re selling yourself. You’re selling someone on your point of view, your thoughts or beliefs, your credibility, a product, etc.
Now don’t mistake [sales] with the stereotypical ‘pushy salesman’. If you associate sales in this way, you’re not only missing an important point, but you actually limit yourself by carrying this negative association to sales. Unconsciously, you will never be good at sales if you believe that salespeople are pushy, manipulating, etc. Because you will never allow yourself to be pushy, manipulating, etc.
We’re constantly selling. It’s natural, to the point we don’t even think about it as sales. Even kids are great at sales. They can make you believe that they ‘have to’ have that toy or candy bar because their lives depend on it.
Communication skills are paramount to any successful relationship, personally or professionally. The common mistake is to misinterpret effective communication with only expression.
2. The Ability to Effectively Listen:
There’s a reason we have 2 ears and only one mouth.
Active listening is the most important aspect of good communication. You can never sell anything until you listen first – I mean really listen. This includes the ability to pick up on underlying emotions or motivators – reading people, like body language.
More often than not, you can be so intent on selling your perspectives that the conversation becomes all about you.
Genuine wisdom is usually conspicuous through modesty and silence. When you’re talking, you’re not learning anything new. It’s only when you’re listening that you gain the other person’s perspective.
All the most successful people I’ve personally come across have the amazing ability to make you feel comfortable and are constantly asking questions. They’re usually the best hosts. You can often tell one’s status or level of success by his/her social skills such as communication.
Remember, sometimes the things that aren’t said can be the most important part of a conversation.
Again, if there’s one skill you need to constantly be developing, it’s communication. Build your life by building your relationships!
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{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }
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What a fantastic short article I really liked reading it
Ha, I think, no, I Know there’s more to it than that. For example, how do you view people? Are you always trying to get something from (someone) or an interaction? Key is to not want anything from Anyone, ever. Be content within.
Selling yourself and listening are temporary external fixes, the Real communication problem you have is inside you. If you have inner demons that haven’t been settled or accepted, good luck with trying to sell yourself.
I like the message, and the Title is true, but I’ve read far too many articles on this, few of them tackle the real issue.
You’re right, there is much more to it than that. Too much to write in any one article. It all comes down to self image from inner peace. Very few people can truly practice, let alone be an example, of this. Thanks for your comment and pardon me if you got the impression I was trying to “sell myself”. We all view the world from our own filters – with judgements and ideals. It can be easy for the ego to blind us from truth or from what is.
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